Holy crap. You're a Roman Emperor.
The number-one annoying people / crap dinner / pre-highschool dance destination in the Universe. Overpriced. Mediocre food. Long waits. Loud, pukey atmosphere that's some weird hybrid between Tuscan-themed casino and Party City the morning after Valentine's day. A grab-bag of grade-a clientelle including, but not limited to: obnoxious, tanning-bed orange prom-goers; braggy, desperate mortage loan officers / personal trainers; lost, confused first daters; motel people. How are there fifteen million of these things?
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